Safe. Secure. Satisfied.
Picture this: it's a beautiful summer day, sun shining, just enough breeze and the clear blue waters of a pristine pool. As you look up, you notice a little child in floaties headed for the diving board. With a face in full smile, the child climbs the ladder and boldly walks out on the diving board. Courageously, the child jumps and hits a complete free fall into her father's arms. Elation. Joy. Love.
In life, we long for this. We long to know what it means to be safe, secure and satisfied. Experiencing this kind of connection, this kind of loving relationship, draws us to life and anchors our self-worth. To be safe, secure and satisfied allows an individual to explore the beauty and wonder that life has to offer.
What are some of the necessary elements that create safety and security? One must know what love is and what love isn't. As we apply that knowledge, we must foster a life that shares love. Additionally, we posture ourselves in such a way that we can receive love. Knowing love, sharing love, and receiving love create a reciprocal relationship with safe and secure bonds. A relationship full of love creates safety and security. A relationship marked by safety and security will be full of love. We must be the type of person that cultivates safe and secure attachments with those around us. The social sciences have produced significant research validating attachment theory within humans. Practically and experientially humans thrive when connected in secure relationships. Humans respond differently in safe and secure systems when compared to distant or avoidant systems. These findings are not surprising to me. The social sciences are highlighting a truth that has been since creation. We were made for relationship. We were intended to know and experience love from a safe and secure bond.
Love leads the way to safety, security and satisfying experiences.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or rude. Love is not self-seeking. Love is not irritable. Love does not keep records of wrongs. Love rejoices in what is true. Love never gives up. Love never loses faith. Love is hopeful. Love endures through all circumstances. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, paraphrased)
A love like this leads us to safe, secure and satisfying relationships. A love like this allows us to create the connections our heart and mind long for. So how do I move toward this?
Think about this...
- Being SAFE: Requires TRUST
- Being SECURE: Requires COMMITMENT
- Being SATISFIED: Requires something LIFE-GIVING
When it comes to relationships we want to foster trust and trustworthiness. We want to offer our commitment through all circumstances. We want the internal and external exchanges to be those that bring life!
Love in its intended form fosters trust, anchors commitment and leads us to life.
Let us love well. Let us be safe, secure, and satisfied.